Standard American Diet (SAD)

“I used to have mad cow disease, but I’m alright noooooo!” (joke)

Assassiversary (assassination + anniversary)

Repeater (a reporter who repeats rather than reports)

Press Corpse (press corps nickname)

“A journalist is an unemployed reporter”

Typing Pool or Stenography Pool (press corps nickname)

Corporat or CorpoRat (corporate/corporation + rat)

“What’s the difference between a banker and a pigeon?” (joke)

“The difference between a farmer and a pigeon is the pigeon can make a deposit on a John Deere”

Amero (proposed North American currency)

Ostrich Economics

Rags to Riches

“Everyone has a plan until they’ve been hit” (boxing adage)

“There are two sides to every story—and then there’s the truth”

Press Corpse (obituary-writing press corps nickname)

“A party in your mouth” (a taste sensation)

“A party in my tummy”

“If I ever need a heart transplant, I want a Republican’s heart—it’s never been used” (joke)

“Republicans want a leader; Democrats want a meeting”

“Professional courtesy” (lawyer joke)

“If you can’t stand behind our troops, stand in front of them”

“Earth first! (we’ll log the other planets later)”

Thugs and Sexual Assailants (Transportation Security Administration or TSA nickname)

“Posting and toasting” (basketball terminology)

“Employees don’t leave their company, they leave their boss” (People leave managers, not companies)

“Happy employees make for happy customers”

“Reduce, reuse, recycle” (waste management’s “three Rs”)

“Show up, keep up and shut up” (golf caddy adage)

Currency of Last Resort (gold nickname)

“God helps those whom God has helped”

“Every day is a school day” (education adage)

“It pays to advertise” (advertising adage)

“Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels”

“I may be fat, but you’re ugly and I can diet”

“Work is for people who don’t know how to fish”

“Show me a good loser and I’ll show you a loser”

“Auto racing, bullfighting, and mountain climbing are the only real sports—all others are games”

Lapdog Media and Watchdog Media

Newsweak (Newsweek nickname)

Yes Man

Pay Every Penny to Save Israel (false Pepsi etymology)

Czechxas (Czech + Texas)

“You are your child’s first teacher”

Grexit (Greece/Greek + exit)

Gentleman’s C

“If you want it bad, you will get it bad”

“There are three good reasons to be a teacher: June, July and August”

“Buckle up your guts”

“Don’t compare me to the Almighty, compare me to the alternative”

Government Motors (General Motors or GM nickname)

“Pace makes the race” (horse racing adage)

“You’re only as good as your second serve” (tennis adage)

“Drive for show and putt for dough” (golf adage)

“Strike for show and spare for dough” (bowling adage)

“Plan your dive and dive your plan” (scuba diving adage)

“Old frisbee players never die—they just end up on the roof”

“Feet first, stick second” (lacrosse adage)

No Action Talk Only (North Atlantic Treaty Organization or NATO nickname)

“Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life”

“Nothing kills a bad product faster than good advertising” (advertising adage)

“The outdoors is what you must pass through in order to get from your apartment into a taxicab”

“If all you ever do is all you’ve ever done, then all you’ll get is all you ever got”

“The man who stops advertising to save money is like the man who stops the clock to save time”

“To feel ‘fit as a fiddle,’ you must tone down your middle”

“Your stomach shouldn’t be a waist basket”

“A foolish faith in authority is the enemy of the truth”

“On the money”

“In the money”

“Bang for the buck”

Mover and Shaker

Hard Line (Hard Liner)

“Baked in the cake” (built into the price or system)

“Countries don’t go bust”

“If it’s too loud, you’re too old” (music adage)

It’s Probably Overpriced (Initial Public Offering or IPO nickname)

Churning

“That’s why they play the games” (sports adage)

“The best teams make the playoffs; the hottest team wins the championship”

Demorrhoids (Democrat + hemorrhoids)

“A win is a win” (sports adage)

“Take one for the team”

“You can’t tell the players without a score card”

“Don’t expect what you don’t inspect” (management adage)

“A goal is a dream with a deadline” (management aphorism)

SWATing (Swatting)

“Two-out hits will get you to heaven” (baseball adage)

“You can’t catch a walk” (baseball adage)

Department of Hopeless Security (Department of Homeland Security or DHS nickname)

“You can expect what you inspect” (management adage)

“Dress for the job you want, not for the job you have” (employment adage)

“String tight for control, loose for power” (racket adage)

“You don’t have to be crazy to work here, but it helps”

“Coffee keeps me busy until it’s time to be drunk”

“Chocolate, men, coffee—some things are better rich”

Nationalized Public Radio (NPR or National Public Radio nickname)

“Kill for show and pass for dough” (handball/racquetball adage)

Realville (a town in the real world)