A plaque remaining from the Big Apple Night Club at West 135th Street and Seventh Avenue in Harlem.

Above, a 1934 plaque from the Big Apple Night Club at West 135th Street and Seventh Avenue in Harlem. Discarded as trash in 2006.

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New York’s B1G Team (Rutgers Scarlet Knights slogan)

Syracuse: “Orange in the Apple” (Syracuse University Orange slogan in the Big Apple)

“What’s the difference between a poorly dressed man on a unicycle & well-dressed man on a bicycle?

“I used to run an origami company, but it folded”

“Opinions are like orgasms—mine matters most, and I don’t care if you have one”

Snopester (fan of Snopes.com)

“I met a girl at a soccer game. I think she’s a keeper”

“No one was eating the farmer’s apples, so I told him to grow a pear”

“What do you do when you see a spaceman?"/"You park, man.”

Times New Ramen (Times New Roman font + ramen noodles)

“Alphabet soup? More like Times New Ramen, am I right?”

Big Yam (Lagos nickname)

Magic City (Omaha, Nebraska nickname)

Big O (Omaha, Nebraska nickname)

“What do you call a crocodile that likes to bowl?"/"An alley gator.”

“Which American president is least guilty?"/"Lincoln. He is in a cent.”

“What kind of tea is hard to swallow?"/"Reality.”

“Which American president is least guilty?"/"Lincoln. He is in a cent.”

“Does balancing my checkbook count as exercise?”

“Does balancing my checkbook count as exercise?”

“Sit-ups are the best exercise because they include the most lying down”

“Does running out of money count as exercise?”

“The most painful exercise is running out of money”

“Does running out of money count as exercise?”

“Vodka pays the bills”

“School minutes are longer than regular minutes”

“Microwave minutes are longer than regular minutes”

“A politician’s back-slapping and hand-shaking is spoiled by leg-pulling”

“A man overdosed on curry powder and went into a korma”

“How much does it cost to get married?” (joke)

“What do you call an accountant with an opinion?"/"An auditor.”

“A man walks into a bar. His alcoholism problem is destroying his family” (bar joke)

First In, Still Here (FISH)

Plattsburgh: Montreal’s U.S. Airport (Plattsburgh International Airport nickname)

“What did the hot dog vendor say at the World Trade Center?” (joke)

Healthonism (health + hedonism); Healthonist

Hudson River: American Rhine (Hudson River nickname)

“What do you call an emo vegetable?"/"A despair-agus.”

Oscars of the East Coast (Met Gala nickname)

Party of the Year (Met Gala nickname)

City That Works (Chicago nickname)

City on the Make (Chicago nickname)

Chi-Town (Chicago nickname)

Second City (Chicago nickname)

Paris on the Prairie (Chicago nickname)

Chiberia (Chicago nickname)

Chi-raq (Chicago nickname)

Garden City (Chicago nickname)

Babylon on the Make

“There is no truth in news and no news in truth” (Russian Izvestia and Pravda adage)

“Do you want a Hurts donut?” (joke)

Trekathon (trek + marathon)

“What do you get if you boil funnybones?"/"A laughing stock.”

“What’s the difference between John Wayne and Jack Daniels?” (joke)

“How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?” (joke)

“Who invented spaghetti?"/"Someone who used his noodle.”

“From sewer to brewer”

“How do you do the wave at a chess match?"/"With your eyebrows.”

Autohoaxer; Autohoaxing

“How many hardware engineers does it take to change a light bulb?” (joke)

“What do the Washington Metro system and the Little Mermaid have in common?” (joke)

Spornosexual (sport + porno + sexual)

“Music is like candy—you throw away the rappers”

“We got both kinds of music—country and western”

“Why did the banana go to the doctor?"/"It wasn’t peeling well.”

“What kind of apple has a short temper?"/"A crab apple.”

“You kill vegetarian vampires with a steak to the heart”

Generation Snowflake

“Why did the man throw a clock out the window?"/"To see time fly”

“Why do cows go to New York City?"/"To see the moosicals.”

“Ideas pull the trigger, but instinct loads the gun”

“When a man tells you that he got rich through hard work, ask him: ‘Whose?‘“

“When a politician does get an idea he usually gets it wrong”

“An idea isn’t responsible for the people who believe in it”

“Only the paranoid survive” (internet adage)

Instagirl (Instagram + girl)

Instagirl (Instagram + girl)

“Will—A dead giveaway”

Human Google (New York Public Library help desk nickname)

“What should you say when the Statue of Liberty sneezes?"/"God bless America.”

“How is a drum solo like a sneeze?” (ioke)

“The phrase ‘Built to stay free’ is an anagram of what monument?” (riddle)

“What do you call a chicken with a bad sunburn?"/"Fried chicken.”

Bartender’s Ketchup (St. Germain elderflower liqueur nickname)

“Monkeys write” (New York Times anagram)

“Why isn’t suntanning an Olympic sport?"/"You can only get bronze.”

Hero Ball (basketball style)

“I know a mathematician who couldn’t afford lunch. He could binomial”

“Yo mama is so fat, when she sits around the house, she sits AROUND the house”

“The story of milk: Good milk, bad milk, cheese!”

Schenectady: “The City that Lights and Hauls the World” (slogan)

Schenectady: Electric City (nickname)

“Why did the scarecrow get a promotion?"/"Because he was outstanding in his field.”

“7/11 is a part-time job”

“Mind your own tits” (breastfeeding saying)

Mannouncer (man + announcer); Mannouncing

“If you would be pungent, be brief”

“When there’s a big solar energy spill, it’s just called ‘a nice day‘“

“If you’re going to ride my ass, at least pull my hair” (bumper sticker)

“I Will” (Chicago motto)

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