New York City has a reputation as a violent place (or at least it had that reputation in the 1970s and 1980s). The comedian Emo Phillips told this joke on his album, E=MO² (1985):
“New York’s such a wonderful city. Although I was at the library today. The guy was very rude. I said, ‘I’d like a card.’ He says, ‘You have to prove you’re a citizen of New York.’ So I stabbed him.”
Wikiquote: Emo Philips
Emo Philips (born 7 February 1956) is an American comedian famous for his eccentric appearance, surreal humor, and the bizarre cadence of his voice in the delivery of his lines.
E=MO² (1985)
New York’s such a wonderful city. Although I was at the library today. The guy was very rude. I said, “I’d like a card.” He says, “You have to prove you’re a citizen of New York.” So I stabbed him.
Straight Dope Message Board
The Emo Phillips Thread
LindyHopper
10-24-2001, 10:45 AM
(...)
I was at the New York Public Library, and I wanted to get a library card; the guy said “You have to prove you’re a citizen of New York”...so I stabbed him.
Google Books
Following the Wrong God Home:
Footloose in an American Dream
By Clive Scott Chisholm
Norman, OK: University of Oklahoma Press
2003
Pg. 358:
All this urban growth and calamity took place in two months, which later reminded me of a quip by Emo Philips: “When I joined the New York Public Library, the guy told me I’d have to prove I was a citizen of New York, so I stabbed him.”
Google Books
How to Get Sued:
An Instructional Guide
By J. Craig Williams
New York, NY: Kaplan Publishing
2008
Pg. 49:
New York’s such a wonderful city. Although I was at the library today. The guy there was very rude. I said, “I’d like a card.” He says, “You have to prove you’re a citizen of New York.” So I stabbed him. —Emo Phillips
Above, a 1934 plaque from the Big Apple Night Club at West 135th Street and Seventh Avenue in Harlem. Discarded as trash in 2006. Now a Popeyes fast food restaurant on Google Maps.
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Above, Big Apple Corner at 54th Street and Broadway in Manhattan. Google Maps. Stolen and missing, 2021-2024.
Above, John J. Fitz Gerald, from the Aug. 15, 1931, Binghamton (NY) Press, pg. 14.
Listen to Robert Emmerich introduce "The Big Apple," a hit song from 1937. Music written by Bob and performed by Tommy Dorsey's Clambake Seven with Bob on piano. Lyrics written by Buddy Bernier and sung by Edythe Wright. Audio provided by Dorothy Emmerich.
Also listen to a 1937 "The Big Apple" song by Ozzie Nelson and his Orchestra. See a 1929 photo of John J. Fitz Gerald and a 1931 photo of John J. Fitz Gerald.
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