"I’m only speeding because I really have to poop” is a popular jocular bumper sticker. “I’m only speeding because I have to poop” has been cited in print since at least 2007.
yelp—Talk San Francisco
What Bumper Sticker Should Be On Your Car?
B.K. W. says:
I actually saw one this past Saturday that said, “I’m only speeding because I have to poop.”
Yeah. Real nice.
Looking at a bumper sticker on the car in front of us that says: “I’m only speeding ‘cause I really have to poop.”
1:20 PM - 29 Apr 2007
Funny Bumper Stickers
Published by Dambrath in Travel
December 2nd, 2007
118. I’m only speeding because i have to poop.
Where the Pavement Ends:
Retreats at Assumption Abbey and Other Contemplative Journeys
By J. T. Knoll
Bloomington, IN: iUnvierse
Which is why, I imagine, the sticker I’M ONLY SPEEDING BECAUSE I HAVE TO POOP! caught my eye a few days later
Travels with Max:
In Search of Steinbeck’s America Fifty Years Later
By Gregory Zeigler
Salt Lake City, UT: Blaine Creek Press
Her car had a bumper sticker that read, “I’m only speeding because I have to poop.”
When I Was Alive
By Rosalyn Hanson
Xlibris Corporation (Xlibris.com)
“Honey, Nick has a bumper sticker on the back of his truck that says ‘I’m only speeding ‘cause I really have to poop.’”