A plaque remaining from the Big Apple Night Club at West 135th Street and Seventh Avenue in Harlem.

Above, a 1934 plaque from the Big Apple Night Club at West 135th Street and Seventh Avenue in Harlem. Discarded as trash in 2006.

Recent entries:
“Swimming isn’t a sport. Swimming is a way to keep from drowning” (10/22)
“Time kills all deals” (10/22)
Entry forthcoming—B.P. (10/22)
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Entry from July 12, 2014
“The score is still 0-0—you haven’t missed anything” (joke)

An old joke is about a young couple arriving very late to a baseball game. The man asks for the score and is told that it’s still 0-0. The woman then declares, “Good! We haven’t missed anything!”

The joke has been cited in print since at least 1913. Modern versions of the joke involve just one late-arriving fan (not a couple) and several sports other than baseball.


6 October 1913, The State-Times (Baton Rouge, LA), pg. 16, col. 7:
MISSED NOTHING.
Heand she arrived in the fifth inning.
He (to a fan)—What’s the score?
Fan—Noting to nothing.
She—Goodey! We haven’t missed a thing.—Illinois Ciren.
(The same joke is in the Google Newspaper Archive from October 9th.—ed.)

17 March 1915, Springfield (MA) Daily News, “Local Pepper Box,” pg. 4, col. 2:
THe present situation in the baseball world hereabouts reminds one of the story of the young woman who was seeing her first game.

It took her so long to get ready that she and her angry escort did not arrive at the park until the seventh inning.

‘What’s the score?” he asked of a fan.

“Nothing to nothing,” was the reply.

“Thank Heaven!” exclaimed thegirl. “We haven’t missed anything.”

Google Books
April 1915, The Sante Fe Magazine, pg. 69, col. 1:
Baseball will soon be in full swing. In the larger cities—and the smaller one, too, for that matter—the youths will take their “goils” to see the game. last year, at the Chicago Federals park, one of these young couplespassed us. They were late. As they brushed by, the girl, who was trying her best to appear interested, said. “What’s the score, Billy?” “Nothing to nothing.” answered her escort. “Oh. goody!” she giggled ecstatically, “then we didn’t miss anything, after all.”

24 May 1925, Boston (MA) Herald, pt. 2, pg. 2, col. 4:
HEARD AT A BALL GAME
As the World Wags:
A couple arrived very late. The man said to the man next to him, “What inning is it?”
“End of the fifth.”
“What’s the score?”
“Nothing to nothing.”
“Oh goody,” said the girl, we haven’t missed anything.”
F. W. S.

22 October 1926. The State-Times (BatonROuge, LA), pg. 6-B, col. 6:
Three Zeros.
She—What’s the score now?
He—0 to 0.
She—Oh, I’m so glad I didn’t miss anything.

12 November 1930, Idaho Daily Statesman (Boise, ID), “Boise-Nampa Football Game As Viewed By Two Co-eds” by Fibbie Hughes, Boise, pg. 1, col. 8:
“What’s the score?—nothing to nothing?—good! I haven’t missed anything then.”

Google Books
Celebrating Ourselves:
African-Americans and the Promise of Baseball

By Daryl Russell Grigsby
Indianapolis, IN: Dog Ear Pub.
2010
Pg. 387:
“This is what I mean,” he told me, “once a fan came late to a game and sat next to me at said, ‘What’s the score?’ ‘When I told him 0-0, the guy said, ‘Good, I didn’t miss anything.’ When he said that, the first thing I thought to myself is, ‘No, you missed a whole lot.’ That’s what baseball is to me, all the drama, subtleties, the game within the game that goes on all the time—that’s what I love.”

Twitter
Tim Knoch
‏@Octim1
So my friend says “ what’s the score?” Zero-Zero. “Good, I haven’t missed anything”. Old joke.
11:28 PM - 12 Jul 2014

Posted by Barry Popik
New York CitySports/Games • Saturday, July 12, 2014 • Permalink