A plaque remaining from the Big Apple Night Club at West 135th Street and Seventh Avenue in Harlem.

Above, a 1934 plaque from the Big Apple Night Club at West 135th Street and Seventh Avenue in Harlem. Discarded as trash in 2006. Now a Popeyes fast food restaurant on Google Maps.

Recent entries:
“Where can you get vegan beef?"/"From a vegetabull.” (8/13)
“When do you know it is time for the cows to go to sleep?"/"When it is pasture bedtime.” (8/13)
“What did the mama cow say to the baby cow?"/"It’s pasture bedtime.” (8/13)
“What time is it when you see a cow laying in a field?"/"Pasture bedtime.” (8/13)
“What time is it when you see cows sleeping in a field?"/"Pasture bedtime.” (8/13)
More new entries...

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“Make breakfast tacos, not war”

“It’s not leaking oil, it’s sweating power” (bumper sticker)

“Pretend to honk if you like mimes” (bumper sticker)

“Your grandfather didn’t sleep in a foxhole in a far away land…so you would surrender your guns”

“Your grandfather didn’t sleep in a foxhole…so you would have to show papers to buy food”

“They somehow managed to demonize coughs, sniffles and having no symptoms at all…”

“I bought some serving spoons, but they haven’t made me any better at tennis”

“We are in the midst of the longest, saddest, most excruciating and unsatisfying ‘I told you so‘“

ABV Disease (Anything But Vaccines)

Vitamin B (beer)

Big Apple Cafe (Cincinnati, OH. 1938-1963)

Big Apple Cafe (Cincinnati, OH, 1938-1963)

Big Apple Cafe, (Shamokin, PA, 1938-1947)

Big Apple Cafe (Shamokin, PA, 1938-1947)

Canned Apple (Big Apple dance + Can-Can dance)

Canned Apple (Big Apple dance + Can-Can dance, 1937)

Big Apple Cafe (Rochester, NY, 1977-2005)

Big Apple Cafe (Rochester, NY, 1977-2005)

Big Apple Cafe (Calgary, Alberta, 1938-1940)

Big Apple Cafe (Calgary, Alberta, 1938-1940)

“Vitamin B? You mean beer?”

Vitamin B (Victoria Bitter or VB nickname)

Big Apple Cafe (Neosho, MO, 1940-1942)

Big Apple Cafe (Neosho, MO, 1940-1942)

Big Apple Restaurant (Covington, KY, 1938)

Big Apple Restaurant (Covington, KY, 1938)

“This morning’s coffee brought to you by here we fucking go again”

“It’s time for Dodger baseball!” (Vin Scully catchphrase)

“Hi everybody, and a pleasant good evening to you, wherever you may be” (Vin Scully catchphrase)

“What does an electrician have for breakfast?"/"An ohmelette.”

“What does an electrical engineer have for breakfast?"/"An ohmelette.”

“Nachos are just chip salad”

“The government is just a business with no incentive to deliver agreed upon services…”

“An informed citizen will always be the biggest threat to the system”

“Check, please!” (restaurant saying)

“If you can’t tell by now that society is being programmed, you’ve been perfectly programmed”

Big Apple Restaurant (Asheville, NC, 1957-1991)

“When life gives you lemons, give them back and tell them you want coffee”

“When life gives you lemons, give them back and tell life you want coffee”

Big Apple Restaurant (Asheville, NC, 1957-1991)

Big Apple (football play at Davidson College, 1937)

Big Apple (football play at Davidson College, 1937)

“An after-dinner speech—‘Check, please‘“

“The Chicago style hot dog implies the existence of the MLA style hot dog”

“Why did the electrician fall in love with every girl he met?"/"Because he couldn’t resistor.”

“Sweet nothings imply the existence of bitter everythings, salty somethings and umami anythings”

“Vegan chicken tenders should be called chicken pretenders”

“Are you a cajun chef? Cause I wanna bayou dinner”

“What do you call a vegan chicken strip?"/"A chicken pretender.”

“Calling it a ‘beer run’ implies exercise, but calling it ‘beer mission’ implies importance”

“Cows eat grass. Therefore, steak is plant-based meat”

“Sweet nothings imply the existence of sour somethings”

“Sweet nothings imply the existence of sour nothings, salty nothings, bitter nothings”

“Wagon Wheels are just cold s’mores”

“There is no dish that requires you to exclusively use both a spoon and a knife”

Deathvax

Psyop-19 (psyop + COVID-19)

“Am I supposed to ask for followers? Asking for a friend”

“How did you find the weather on your vacation?"/"I just went outside and there it was.”

Indigestive Biscuit

“I like my bibliographies the way I like my hot dogs: Chicago style”

“S’mores are just warmed up Wagon Wheels”

“Digestive biscuits imply the existence of indigestive biscuits”

“I like my citations like I like my pizza: Chicago style”

“I’m not a competitive person. I’m always the first to admit it”

“I’m not a competitive person… I’ll be the first to admit it”

“I like my citations like I like my hot dogs: Chicago style”

“S’mores are campfire Wagon Wheels”

“Wagon Wheels are British s’mores”

“Chicago style pizza implies the existence of AP style pizza”

“Chicago style pizza implies the existence of MLA style pizza”

“I like my pizza like I like my citations: Chicago style”

“What’s a light-year?"/"One-third less calories than a regular year.”

“Recipe for ice cream soup—one part ice cream, three parts waiting”

“There are only two ingredients to ice cream soup—ice cream and patience”

“I can’t stand broken tripods”

“Sometimes you just have to sit in the car and let the song finish”

“People who stay in the car to listen to music a little bit longer are my kind of people”

“Me at home: Why isn’t there more kindness in the world?/Me while driving: I hate everyone”

“Does anyone have a recipe for ice cream soup?”

“The greatest trick the refrigerator manufacturers ever pulled…” (crisper drawer)

“Wednesdays are like Mondays in the middle of the week!”

“Wednesday: not as depressing as Monday, not as exciting as Friday”

“Hump Day Wednesday: not as depressing as Monday, not as exciting as Friday”

“Dim Sum implies the existence of Bright Difference”

Biostitute (biologist + prostitute)

“Hump Day: not as depressing as Monday, not as exciting as Friday”

“What do you call a Cajun who never tells the truth?"/"Jumbolaya.”

“What do you call a large Louisianan who never tells the truth?"/"A jambalaya.”

“Dim sum implies the existence of dim min, max, and average”

“Espresso martinis are just Four Lokos for adults”

“Espresso martinis are just Four Lokos that went to grad school”

“Espresso martinis are millennial women’s Four Loko”

“An espresso martini is just a Four Loko with a 401k”

“An espresso martini is just a classy Four Loko”

“An espresso martini is the rich man’s Four Loko”

“Espresso martinis are just bougie Four Lokos”

“Espresso martinis are the Four Lokos of the bourgeoisie”

“Stop saying you love wings if you order boneless. You love nuggets”

“Boneless chicken wings are just chicken nuggets for adults”

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