A plaque remaining from the Big Apple Night Club at West 135th Street and Seventh Avenue in Harlem.

Above, a 1934 plaque from the Big Apple Night Club at West 135th Street and Seventh Avenue in Harlem. Discarded as trash in 2006.

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Entry from April 04, 2018
“Do you have a bathroom?"/"No, we shit outside in the yard.”

A house guest (or someone in a restaurant or a store) might ask, “Do you have a bathroom?” This really means, “Where is the bathroom and I can use it now?” However, a literal, jocular answer to “Do you have a bathroom?” that has been printed on many images is: “No, we shit outside in the yard.”

The joke was printed in the New York (NY) Times on February 4, 1998:

“Off to the customer service counter. ‘Do you have a bathroom?’ he asked a woman whose name tag read ‘Dorothy.’ ‘No, we go outside,’ she replied sarcastically, then pointed him in the right direction. A loss of points? ‘She got a laugh out of me,’ Mr. Jolly said. ‘New Yorkers have attitude. That was fine.’”

“I love people who walk into my store and ask Are you open? or Do you have a bathroom? NO we fuckin pee outside, and were closed so leave!” was posted on Twitter on January 10, 2009. “My favorite from working in restaurants: ‘do you have a bathroom?’ No sir… you have to go outside” was posted on Twitter on November 7, 2010. The bathroom joke went viral in 2011.


New York (NY) Times
The Undercover Shoppers; Posing as Customers, Paid Agents Grade the Stores
By JENNIFER STEINHAUER FEB. 4, 1998
(...)
Off to the customer service counter. ‘’Do you have a bathroom?’’ he asked a woman whose name tag read ‘’Dorothy.’’ ‘’No, we go outside,’’ she replied sarcastically, then pointed him in the right direction. A loss of points? ‘’She got a laugh out of me,’’ Mr. Jolly said. ‘’New Yorkers have attitude. That was fine.’’

Twitter
Coug @BLFC18
@a_puma01
i love people who walk into my store and ask Are you open? or Do you have a bathroom? NO we fuckin pee outside, and were closed so leave!
8:52 AM - 10 Jan 2009

Twitter
Karen Smith
@karensmith1985
Favorite question I get asked at the mall:  “Do you have a bathroom here?” No, you just have to hold it or find a bush outside!!  Idiots.
10:16 AM - 14 Dec 2009

Twitter
Polly Kyle
@PollyAnneK
Replying to @heyescapist
@heysuburban my favorite from working in restaurants: “do you have a bathroom?” No sir… you have to go outside.
11:56 AM - 7 Nov 2010

Twitter
Kayla Strong
@KaylaStrong1
#questionsidonylike “do you have a bathroom?”.. no i dont i did a hole in the back yard to sht..really? come on ppl
12:07 AM - 1 Feb 2011

Twitter
Aisha Naika Austin
@aishaanaikaa_
“ do you have a bathroom?” - “ na, we just pee outside “
5:25 PM - 10 Mar 2011

Twitter
Carlyefries
@sivxxth
When people ask “do you have a bathroom?” nooooo. I pee outside in a bush. #stupidquestions
5:43 PM - 9 Apr 2011

Twitter
Don Brent Berlusconi
@fadabrent
I hate when people come my yard and ask, “Do you have a bathroom?” - “No, we shit outside.” #shellingzsundaze
2:47 PM - 31 Jul 2011

Twitter
Perfect Boyfriend!
@GentIemenNotes
When friends ask, “Hey, do you have a bathroom?”..I think to myself, “Of course we don’t, we shit outside..” -_-
2:26 PM - 9 Sep 2011

Twitter
$MV
@rinabina5
When people ask you “aye do you have a bathroom I can use?” nah we use a hole on the back yard -_- lmao
8:37 PM - 24 Sep 2011

Twitter
ieva [ee-va]
@itsieva
when my friends ask ‘hey, do you have a bathroom?’ i’m like ‘of course not, we shit outside, idiot.’
6:57 AM - 3 Oct 2011

Twitter
Annette Li
@ImBieberLi
When a guest comes over and says, “Do you have a bathroom?”. No, we just pee in the front yard.
3:30 PM - 4 Oct 2011

Twitter
Taylor.
@L0ve_Symone
“Do you have a bathroom ?” “no we just shit in the yard” lol
9:13 PM - 7 Oct 2011

We Know Memes
Do You Have A Bathroom?
– JUNE 9, 2012
POSTED IN: MEMES, PICS, RAGE COMICS, RAGE GUY COMICS
I hate it when people are at your house and ask “Do you have a bathroom?” No, we shit in the yard.

Google Books
More One Liners, Jokes and Gags
Compiled by Grant Tucker
London, UK: Biteback Publishing Ltd
2013
Pg. ?:
I hate it when people are at your house and ask ‘Do you have a bathroom?’ No, we crap in the garden.

Twitter
A Comical Badass
@AComicalBadass
*Friend comes over* FRIEND: “Do you have a bathroom?” ME: “No, we shit outside.”
2:42 PM - 2 Apr 2018

Posted by Barry Popik
Wednesday, April 04, 2018 • Permalink