A plaque remaining from the Big Apple Night Club at West 135th Street and Seventh Avenue in Harlem.

Above, a 1934 plaque from the Big Apple Night Club at West 135th Street and Seventh Avenue in Harlem. Discarded as trash in 2006.

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“There are over 7,500 different types of apple, but only one ‘apple juice‘“ (3/20)
“Alcohol you later” (3/20)
“Our town is so small we don’t have a town drunk, so we all take turns” (3/20)
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Entry from December 24, 2017
“If you were a vegetable, you’d be a cutecumber”

"If you were a vegetable, you’d be a cutecumber” (cute + cucumber) is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. “‘If you were a vegetable, you’d be a CUTEcumber.’ - Me, while looking in the mirror” was posted on Twitter on May 17, 2011. “Boyy if you was a vegetable you’d be a cutecumber if you was a coin you’d be a dime if you was a fruit you’d be a cutie otay I’m done” was posted on Twitter on April 11, 2012.

A mean addition is sometimes made, either by that same person or by the other person (the “cutecumber"). “If you were a vegetable, I’d call you cutecumber.. actually scratch that, If you were a vegetable, I’d pull the plug” was posted on Twitter on August 15, 2014.

“If you were a fruit, you’d be a fineapple” is a related saying.


Twitter
Paige Scott‏
@paging_paige
“If it was a vegetable in the garden it would be a CUTEcumber” -@dazzcoach #ladybirds #nationalspractice
8:26 PM - 28 Mar 2011

Twitter
COMMANDER COOL®‏
@vojha
“If you were a vegetable, you’d be a CUTEcumber.” - Me, while looking in the mirror.
3:13 PM - 17 May 2011

Twitter
stephaniewakelin‏
@waakke
If you were a veggie, you’d be a cute-cumber (jus made that up)
12:23 AM - 28 Jan 2012

Twitter
Sean Hargis‏
@Invertedorange1
Lucy, if you were a vegetable you would be a CUTEcumber. :p
1:43 AM - 11 Mar 2012

Twitter
Jaclyn‏
@jaCkEyyQ
Boyy if you was a vegetable you’d be a cutecumber if you was a coin you’d be a dime if you was a fruit you’d be a cutie otay I’m done
5:36 PM - 11 Apr 2012

Twitter
Pickup Lines!‏
@pickupIines
If you were a vegetable you’d be a cutecumber.
8:30 PM - 29 Dec 2013

Thought Catalog
Ten Tinder Lines That Just Aren’t Working
By Christine-Marie Dixon, August 5th 2014
(...)
1. “If you were a fruit, you’d be a fineapple.” Also, “If you were a vegetable, you’d be a cutecumber.”
These are the main ingredients in a “cheeser” salad.

Twitter
ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤғㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ‏
@theironfight
If you were a vegetable, I’d call you cutecumber..
actually scratch that,
If you were a vegetable, I’d pull the plug.
5:23 PM - 15 Aug 2014

Twitter
mum‏
@pasty_ass_mum
“If you were a fruit, you’d be a fineapple” “if you were a vegetable, I’d pull the plug”
11:40 PM - 19 Aug 2014

Twitter
SRCHOR ALAYEN‏
@xARCHONSLAYERx
@LoLPonyprancer if you were a vegetable you’d be a cutecumber. Just kidding, if you were a vegetable I’d pull the plug off.
1:30 PM - 8 Oct 2014

Google Books
Tinder Nightmares
By Unspirational
New York, NY: Abrams
2015
Pg. 26:
If you were a vegetable you’d be a cutecumber smile

14 May 2015, MX (Melbourne, Australia), “Here’s Looking at You,” pg. 20:
Darkskindude TOO CUTE: To the guy on the 5.20pm Pakenham line on Tuesday in the Levis shirt and hoodie: If you were a vegetable you’d be a cute-cumber. Coffee?

Odyssey
Top 15 Tinder Pick Up Lines
You love them, you hate them.

Shelby Ferguson
Apr 4, 2016
(...)
9. If you were a vegetable you’d be a cutecumber.
Be healthy… Eat your vegetables

Reddit—Mean Jokes
If you were a vegetable (self.MeanJokes)
submitted June 23, 2016 by Krypt-Krisis
“If you were a vegetable you would be a cutecumber” “Thanks, if you were a vegetable I would pull the plug”

Google Books
Have You Heard the One About . . .:
More Than 500 Side-Splitting Jokes!

By Justin Sedgwick
New York, NY: Skyhorse Publishing
2017
Pg. ?:
If you were a vegetable, you’d be a cute-cumber.

Reddit—Jokes
If you were a vegetable, you’d be a cutecumber!
submitted December 25, 2017 by Trhel2
Just kidding; if you were a vegetable, I’d pull the plug.

Posted by Barry Popik
New York CityFood/Drink • Sunday, December 24, 2017 • Permalink