“The Improper Fractions Helpline is now open 24/7” is a math joke that has been printed on coffee mugs. “My top-heavy fractions helpline is now open 24/7” was posted on Twitter by Sickipedia_Feed on October 14, 2012.
“My improper fractions helpline is now open 24/7” was posted on Twitter on April 14, 2013. “The Joy of Bex” posted the same line on Twitter on November 26, 2014—over a year later—and this won The Aperiodical‘s “Best Math Puns of 2014 Competition.
“If you’re having trouble understanding fractions, don’t worry, our helpline is open 24/7” was posted on Reddit—Oneliners on December 8, 2017.
Twitter
Sickipedia_Feed
@Sickipedia_Feed
my top-heavy fractions helpline is now open 24/7. http://bit.ly/XbnRKD
10:35 PM - 14 Oct 2012
Twitter
Stuart Dunne
@StuartDunne
my top-heavy fractions helpline is now open 24/7.
2:14 AM - 15 Oct 2012
Twitter
graham hill
@grahamhill12
My improper fractions helpline is now open 24/7.
9:42 AM - 14 Apr 2013
Twitter
The Joy of Bex
@debecca
My improper fractions helpline is now open 24/7.
3:44 AM - 26 Nov 2014
The Aperiodical
The Aperiodical’s Best Maths Pun of 2014 Competition – The Results
By Katie Steckles and Christian Lawson-Perfect. Posted January 9, 2015 in Competitions
(...)
The Aperiodical’s Best Maths Pun of 2014
My improper fractions helpline is now open 24/7.
(@debecca)
James: Simple, beautiful, tidy. Also, I want a helpline like that, we could call it the Sumaritans. (a bonus point to James for that effort – CP)
Peter: A stand out.
Katie: A strong contender.
Paul: Obviously an excellent pun, though a controversial one, because puns are normally spoken but this one works better written down.
Steve: I like it.
Twitter
James Martin
@Pundamentalism
Can’t help but feel it’s a little cruel that the helpline for people who struggle with fractions is open 24/7.
4:40 PM - 30 Jan 2016
Twitter
CubbyHawk Covfefe
@eddiedavila40
Having trouble understanding top heavy fractions?
Our helpline is open 24/7.
10:00 AM - 20 Mar 2017
21 June 2017, Leicester (UK) Mercury, pg. 15:
Smile with Steve
FOR all you readers out there who have trouble understanding “top heavy fractions” I’ll gladly help you. Give me a call, my helpline is open 24/7.
Steve Birch, Coalville
Reddit—Oneliners
If you’re having trouble understanding fractions, don’t worry, our helpline is open 24/7.
submitted December 8, 2017 by madazzahatter
Above, a 1934 plaque from the Big Apple Night Club at West 135th Street and Seventh Avenue in Harlem. Discarded as trash in 2006. Now a Popeyes fast food restaurant on Google Maps.
Recent entries:
•“I read old books because I would rather learn from those who built civilization than those who tore it down” (4/18)
•“I study old buildings because I would rather learn from those who built civilization than those who tore it down” (4/18)
•“Due to personal reasons, I’m still going to be fluffy this summer” (4/18)
•Entry in progress—BP17 (4/18)
•Entry in progress—BP16 (4/18)
More new entries...
Above, Big Apple Corner at 54th Street and Broadway in Manhattan. Google Maps. Stolen and missing, 2021-2024.
Above, John J. Fitz Gerald, from the Aug. 15, 1931, Binghamton (NY) Press, pg. 14.
Listen to Robert Emmerich introduce "The Big Apple," a hit song from 1937. Music written by Bob and performed by Tommy Dorsey's Clambake Seven with Bob on piano. Lyrics written by Buddy Bernier and sung by Edythe Wright. Audio provided by Dorothy Emmerich.
Also listen to a 1937 "The Big Apple" song by Ozzie Nelson and his Orchestra. See a 1929 photo of John J. Fitz Gerald and a 1931 photo of John J. Fitz Gerald.
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