A plaque remaining from the Big Apple Night Club at West 135th Street and Seventh Avenue in Harlem.

Above, a 1934 plaque from the Big Apple Night Club at West 135th Street and Seventh Avenue in Harlem. Discarded as trash in 2006.

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Entry from March 23, 2018
“I’m going to attack you with the neck of a guitar."/"Is that a fret?”

A guitar joke has been printed on several images:

“This bloke said to me: ‘I’m going to attack you with the neck of a guitar.’ I said: ‘Is that a fret?’”

“Fret” sounds like “threat.” The joke was told by English comedian Tim Vine at the Edinburgh Festival Fringe in August 2014.

Versions of the joke had been cited earlier on Twitter. “Someone was planning to attack me with a bass guitar. I said: ‘Is that a fret?’” was posted on Twitter on November 18, 2011. “Someone just said they they were going to hit me with the neck of their guitar. I said ‘is that a fret?’” was posted on Twitter on January 3, 2014.


Wikipedia: Tim Vine
Timothy Mark “Tim” Vine (born 4 March 1967) is an English writer, actor, comedian and presenter, known for his quick-fire puns and his role on the BBC series Not Going Out until his departure in 2012. He has released a number of DVDs of his stand-up comedy and has written several joke books. In 2010 and 2014, Vine won the award for best joke at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival. His winning jokes were: “I’ve just been on a once-in-a-lifetime holiday. I’ll tell you what, never again” and “I decided to sell my Hoover ... well it was just collecting dust.” He was the runner up in 2011, 2012 and 2013.

Twitter
allegra
@allegra0
@SimonJCLeBON RT @ben1987: @allegra0 Someone was planning to attack me with a bass guitar. I said: “Is that a fret?”
6:18 PM - 18 Nov 2011

Twitter
Big Giddy 🧠
@Gi3MO_
@HatterBarcode to pissed-off guitar guy: IS THAT A FRET. arghahaha
7:05 AM - 10 Jan 2013

Twitter
Ian Hall
@Ian64
A musician pushed his guitar against my face.’ Is that a fret?’ I asked.
3:56 AM - 30 Jul 2013

Twitter
Will
@ingandable
“Would you like me to teach you how to play the guitar?”
“Is that a fret?”
“No, I was trying to...Nevermind...”
8:00 AM - 21 Dec 2013

Twitter
Peter Ashman
@Peter_Ashman
Someone just said they they were going to hit me with the neck of their guitar. I said “is that a fret?”
5:41 AM - 3 Jan 2014

12 August 2014, The Guardian (London, UK), “A roundup of the best jokes from the fringe so far” by James Kettle, pg. 10:
Tim Vine
This bloke said to me, “I’m going to attack you with the neck of a guitar.” I said, “Is that a fret?”

Twitter
Wilde Thingy
@wildethingy
“I’m going to hit you with the neck of this guitar.”
“Is that a fret?”
7:55 AM - 12 Aug 2014

Reddit—United Kingdom
The 27 best Edinburgh festival one-liners (self.unitedkingdom)
submitted August 17, 2014 by ThinkytEngland
(...)
10. This bloke said to me: ‘I’m going to attack you with the neck of a guitar.’ I said: ‘Is that a fret?’ Tim Vine

Reddit—Jokes
A guy said to me: ‘I’m going smack you with this guitar.’
submitted June 9, 2015 by Linalg2
I said: ‘Is that a fret?
Then I sold my guitar to a bloke with no arms.
I asked him how it was going to work, he replied: ‘I’m going to play it by ear’.

Reddit—Jokes
I once told a guy I was going to attack him with the neck of a guitar…
submitted August 18, 2015 by turkeyskirt
The guy said, “IS THAT A FRET?”

Twitter
🤣 The Dad Joke Man 😉
@DadJokeMan
This bloke said to me, “I’m going to attack you with the neck of a guitar.” I said, “Is that a fret?”.... #UKPunDay
6:49 AM - 12 Feb 2018

Reddit—Cleanjokes
I was in the pub last night and this bloke said to me, “I’m going to attack you with the neck of a guitar.” (self.cleanjokes)
submitted March 23, 2018 by madazzahatterQuality “Ugh” Contributor
I said, “Is that a fret?”
COMMENTS
Le_Mew_Le_Purr
This one really strikes a chord.

Posted by Barry Popik
New York CityMusic/Dance/Theatre/Film • Friday, March 23, 2018 • Permalink