A yardstick joke was printed in The Evening Star (Washington, DC) on December 11, 1922:
Sambo—Ah sees where dey ain’t making yardsticks any longer.
Snowball—Why am dat?
Sambo—Dey’s long enough.
“I was sad to learn that my favorite office supply company will not be making yardsticks any longer” was posted on Twitter by Namnezia on June 6, 2017. “They aren’t making yardsticks any longer” was posted on August 2, 2018.
“Shortbread—They’re not making it any longer” is a similar joke.
Chronicling America
11 December 1922, The Evening Star (Washington, DC), “Pithy Paragraphs,” pg. 32, col. 3:
Sambo—Ah sees where dey ain’t making yardsticks any longer.
Snowball—Why am dat?
Sambo—Dey’s long enough.
J. CLARENCE SMITH,
712 C street northeast.
15 December 1922, Rockford (IL) Morning Star, “Sport Squints,” pg. 14, col. 6:
Honk Garrett: “Ah sees where dey ain’t making yardsticks any longer.”
Mr. Ryan: “Why is that, Henry?”
Mr. Garrett: “Dey’s long enough.”
Chronicling America
15 January 1923, The Evening Capital (Annapolis, MD), pg. 4, col. 2:
Sambo—Ah sees where dey ain’t making yardsticks any longer.
Snowball—Why am dat?
Sambo—Dey’s long enough.—Washington Star.
Twitter
WildWestWarren
@WildWestWarren
I just heard they aren’t making yardsticks any longer !!!!!
7:22 PM - 11 May 2017
Twitter
ChadwickPrep
@ChadwickPrep
Did you know they won’t be making yardsticks any longer?
2:06 AM - 30 May 2017
Twitter
Namnezia
@Namnezia
I was sad to learn that my favorite office supply company will not be making yardsticks any longer.
8:50 AM - 6 Jun 2017
Google Books
The Funny Book:
Good Jokes and Puns
By Kendric C. Smith
BookBaby
2018
Pg. ?:
They are not going to make yardsticks any longer.
Reddit—Dad Jokes
They’re not going to make yardsticks any longer. (self.dadjokes)
submitted July 18, 2018 by CheeseheadDave
COMMENTS
Thumbs0fDestiny
Or shorter.
Reddit—Shower Thoughts
They aren’t making yardsticks any longer
submitted August 2, 2018 by dalphus1
Reddit—Oneliners
Did you hear that they’re not making yardsticks any longer?
submitted September 5, 2018 by djklup
Above, a 1934 plaque from the Big Apple Night Club at West 135th Street and Seventh Avenue in Harlem. Discarded as trash in 2006. Now a Popeyes fast food restaurant on Google Maps.
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Above, Big Apple Corner at 54th Street and Broadway in Manhattan. Google Maps. Stolen and missing, 2021-2024.
Above, John J. Fitz Gerald, from the Aug. 15, 1931, Binghamton (NY) Press, pg. 14.
Listen to Robert Emmerich introduce "The Big Apple," a hit song from 1937. Music written by Bob and performed by Tommy Dorsey's Clambake Seven with Bob on piano. Lyrics written by Buddy Bernier and sung by Edythe Wright. Audio provided by Dorothy Emmerich.
Also listen to a 1937 "The Big Apple" song by Ozzie Nelson and his Orchestra. See a 1929 photo of John J. Fitz Gerald and a 1931 photo of John J. Fitz Gerald.
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