“Quantum mechanics” shouldn’t be confused with “auto mechanics,” but there are jokes. “There is a hoary old joke: What do you call a physicist who works on quantum theory? Why, a quantum mechanic, of course!” was published in a 2004 book.
 
“If your particles won’t start, do you call a quantum mechanic? (You can’t beat physical comedy)” was posted on Twitter by Mal Johns on November 21, 2009. “What do you call a short guy who works on cars? A quantum mechanic” was posted on Twitter by tim on September 17, 2013. “What do you call a dwarf who works on cars? A quantum mechanic” was posted on Twitter by Logical Libertarian™ on November 27, 2016. “What do you call a person who works in very small cars? A quantum mechanic” was posted on Reddit—ScienceHumour on March 22, 2018.
       
Quantum mechanics work on time machines as well as cars. “I foun my time machine, but it has a broken quantum drive. Anyone know of a good quantum mechanic?” was posted on Twitter by Jason T. on July 2, 2009. “I wonder, if your time machine breaks down do you call a quantum mechanic ?” was posted on Twitter by jim walker on February 25, 2010. “My time machine is broken. Does anyone know a good quantum mechanic?” was posted on Twitter by Paul Curtis on February 28, 2016.
 
   
Wikipedia: Quantum mechanics
Quantum mechanics (QM; also known as quantum physics, quantum theory, the wave mechanical model, or matrix mechanics), including quantum field theory, is a fundamental theory in physics which describes nature at the smallest scales of energy levels of atoms and subatomic particles.
   
Google Books
Schrodinger’s Rabbits:
The Many Worlds of Quantum
By Colin Bruce
Washington, DC: Joseph Henry Press
2004
Pg. 211:
There is a hoary old joke: What do you call a physicist who works on quantum theory? Why, a quantum mechanic, of course! The joke is funny (at least to physicists) because most quantum theorists are just about as far from being practical, applied types as it is possible to get.
     
Twitter 
Jason T.
@PotatoFilm
I foun my time machine, but it has a broken quantum drive. Anyone know of a good quantum mechanic?
2:22 PM - 2 Jul 2009
 
Twitter
Mal Johns
@maljohnswales
If your particles won’t start, do you call a quantum mechanic? (You can’t beat physical comedy).
4:23 AM - 21 Nov 2009
   
Twitter
jim walker
@bigjim8o8
I wonder, if your time machine breaks down do you call a quantum mechanic ?
7:10 PM - 25 Feb 2010
 
Google Groups: sci.physics
decoherence
RichD
4/2/10
On Mar 31,  BURT

wrote:
> > Modulated by the hermeneutics of quantum gravity.
>
> Quantum gravity is the falling particle’s quantum waves.
 
What do you call a bunch of street urchins stuffed into a VW?
Quantum waifs!
 
(and if they overload it, you call a Quantum mechanic)
   
Twitter
▓▒░ TORLEY ░▒▓ ♫
@torley
If your time machine is broken, do you call a quantum mechanic?
11:57 AM - 29 May 2011
     
Twitter
tim
@timothyedwintee
“What do you call a short guy who works on cars? A quantum mechanic”
12:09 PM - 17 Sep 2013
     
Twitter
Charles Swiger
@chswiger
Who do you call when your #nanotechnology machine breaks? A Quantum Mechanic.
8:17 AM - 4 Jun 2015
   
Twitter
Kerrash Landing
@Kerrrash
What do you call someone who repairs sub atomic particles? A quantum mechanic. 😊 #SciencePun
11:56 AM - 2 Nov 2015 from Lydney, England
   
Twitter
Paul Curtis
@PaulCurtissss
My time machine is broken. Does anyone know a good quantum mechanic?
12:38 PM - 28 Feb 2016
 
Twitter
Logical Libertarian™
@LgclLibertarian
What do you call a dwarf who works on cars?
A quantum mechanic.
5:44 PM - 27 Nov 2016 from Pickerington, OH
 
Reddit—ScienceHumour
What do you call a person who works in very small cars? (self.ScienceHumour)
submitted March 22, 2018 by quantum_paradoxx
A quantum mechanic
 
Twitter
Marvin Castillo
@Cero_Absoluto
What do you call a person who works on really small cars?
A Quantum Mechanic.
OMFG I’M DYING.
11:12 AM - 13 Apr 2018
 
Reddit—Jokes
What do you call someone who fixes tiny cars?
submitted August 9, 2018 by SythHamster
A quantum mechanic