A group of crows is a “murder.” A riddle has been printed on several images:
Q: What do you call two crows on a branch?
A: Attempted murder.
“What do you call two crows on a branch? Attempted Murder” was posted on Twitter by Proverbs 31:8-9 on October 15, 2011.
“I called the cops about a murder on my front lawn and they just hung up. They said that couldn’t do anything about crows and to stop calling” is a related joke.
Twitter
Proverbs 31:8-9
@sargeabernathy
What do you call two crows on a branch? Attempted Murder.
5:35 PM · Oct 15, 2011·Twitter SMS
Twitter
captain
@destroyer95ca
Replying to @WayneBogda
@WayneBogda @philosophy_muse
The philosophy muse heads up
“Attempted murder “
Crows
On a branch
Call a friend
Clue please
1:34 AM · Jun 4, 2013·Twitter for iPhone
Twitter
Soma Pullela
@somapullela
What do you call two crows on a branch? Attempted murder. #geekhumor
2:13 PM · Jun 29, 2013·Twitter Web Client
6 July 2013, The Independent (London, UK), “So, an infinite number of mathematicians go into a bar” by Andrew Johnson, pg. 13:
12. What do you call two crows on a branch? Attempted murder.
Mirror (London, UK)
By Keir Mudie
21:53, 13 JUL 2013 UPDATED10:53, 23 SEP 2014
(...)
What do you call two crows on a branch? Attempted murder.
A murder is the collective noun for a load of crows. Technically there must be at least three crows to make a murder.
Twitter
Kathryn Schulz
@kathrynschulz
What do you call two crows on a branch?
Attempted murder.
(And 49 other very nerdy jokes: http://bit.ly/18DvPTp HT @David_Dobbs)
1:12 PM · Oct 7, 2013·Twitter Web Client
Reddit—Jokes
Posted by u/tyzo789 August 23, 2015
What do you call two crows on a branch?
Attempted murder.
Storypick
19 Intelligent Jokes That You Need To Read Twice To Understand – Part 2
BY ANANTA SHARMA
28TH DECEMBER 2015
(...)
15. What do you call two crows on a branch? Attempted murder.
Hint: A murder is a collective noun for a group of crows. Technically, a murder is used to refer to three crows.
Reddit—Jokes
Posted by u/pancakesorcantcakes February 12, 2016
what do you call two crows on a branch?
attempted murder
Reddit—Cleanjokes
Posted by u/chacham2 August 17, 2020
Two crows that tried to start their own flock were arrested. What were they charged with?
Attempted murder.
COMMENTS
Up-The-Irons_2
Was there probable caws?
Twitter
CARTEL™
@naija_spy
What do you call two crows on a branch? Attempted murder.
7:04 AM · Jul 18, 2020·Twitter for Android
Above, a 1934 plaque from the Big Apple Night Club at West 135th Street and Seventh Avenue in Harlem. Discarded as trash in 2006. Now a Popeyes fast food restaurant on Google Maps.
Recent entries:
•
“You can’t leave those who created the problem in charge of the solution” (6/1)
•
“You simply cannot leave those who created the problem in chare of the solution!” (6/1)
•
“Our flag does not fly because the wind moves it. It flies with the last breath of each soldier…” (6/1)
•
“You can’t just leave those who created the problem in charge of the solution” (6/1)
•
Entry in progress—BP (6/1)
More new entries...
Above, Big Apple Corner at 54th Street and Broadway in Manhattan. Google Maps.
Above, John J. Fitz Gerald, from the Aug. 15, 1931, Binghamton (NY) Press, pg. 14.
Listen to Robert Emmerich introduce "The Big Apple," a hit song from 1937. Music written by Bob and performed by Tommy Dorsey's Clambake Seven with Bob on piano. Lyrics written by Buddy Bernier and sung by Edythe Wright. Audio provided by Dorothy Emmerich.
Also listen to a 1937 "The Big Apple" song by Ozzie Nelson and his Orchestra. See a 1929 photo of John J. Fitz Gerald and a 1931 photo of John J. Fitz Gerald.
This site is edited by Barry Popik.