A UK riddle about football (soccer) is:
Q: Why can’t cars play football?
A: Because they only have one boot.
A car’s “boot” is its “trunk” (US). A person’s boot is the foot. The joke has been cited in print since at least 1999.
17 January 1999, News of the World (London, UK), “Funny old game” by Rory McGrath, pg. 73:
WHY are cars so awful at playing football? Because they only have one boot.
Google Groups: alt.happy.valley
One for f**tie fans 😉)
§ireßird
1/14/02
Why can’t cars play f**tb*ll?
Because they only have one boot!
31 March 2005, Evening Chronicle (Newcastle-upon-Tyne, UK), “Pop the question?,” pg. 40:
Q. Why can cars not play football?
A. Because they have only one boot.
19 October 2002, Evening Mail (Birmingham, UK), “You’re Joking,” pg. 33:
Why can’t cars play football? Because they only have one boot each!
Twitter
Michelle Fincham
@playfulchild
Why can’t cars play football? because they only have one boot :o)
2:37 PM - 8 Feb 2010
25 February 2018, The Daily Telegraph (Surry Hills, New South Wales), “Laugh till your face hurts,” pg. 3:
Q: Why can’t cars play soccer?
A: Because they only have one boot!
Twitter
Cars45
@cars45ng
Why can’t cars play football?
Because they have only one boot
#Cars45DryJokesWednesday
#DryJokesWednesday
#Football
#WorldCup
#FifaWorldCup
#InstaWorldCup
#Cars45
5:15 AM - 13 Jun 2018
Twitter
BookMyGarage
@book_my_garage
Replying to @ClickDealerLTD @CWMMOTORS and 9 others
Why can’t cars play football?...
Because they only have one boot
#TellAnOldJokeDay #TwitterCarClub 🤣🚗👍🏽
7:02 AM - 24 Jul 2018
Above, a 1934 plaque from the Big Apple Night Club at West 135th Street and Seventh Avenue in Harlem. Discarded as trash in 2006. Now a Popeyes fast food restaurant on Google Maps.
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Above, Big Apple Corner at 54th Street and Broadway in Manhattan. Google Maps. Stolen and missing, 2021-2024.
Above, John J. Fitz Gerald, from the Aug. 15, 1931, Binghamton (NY) Press, pg. 14.
Listen to Robert Emmerich introduce "The Big Apple," a hit song from 1937. Music written by Bob and performed by Tommy Dorsey's Clambake Seven with Bob on piano. Lyrics written by Buddy Bernier and sung by Edythe Wright. Audio provided by Dorothy Emmerich.
Also listen to a 1937 "The Big Apple" song by Ozzie Nelson and his Orchestra. See a 1929 photo of John J. Fitz Gerald and a 1931 photo of John J. Fitz Gerald.
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