“How did the hipster burn his tongue?/"He drank his coffee before it was cool” is a popular riddle. There are anti-joke variations.
“Why did the hipster burn his tongue? Because he’s human and we all make mistakes” was posted on Twitter by Tristan Orlick on December 2, 2012. “Why did the hipster burn his tongue? Because he’s an idiot” was posted on Twitter by Zoë Morel on February 24, 2013. “Why did the hipster burn his mouth on his coffee? Because he’s an idiot” was posted on Reddit—Jokes on December 30, 2020.
Twitter
Tristan Orlick
@TristanOrlick
Why did the hipster burn his tongue?
Because he’s human and we all make mistakes.
2:18 AM · Dec 2, 2012·Tweetbot for iOS
Twitter
Zoë Morel
@_zoesophia
Why did the hipster burn his tongue?
Because he’s an idiot.
6:27 PM · Feb 24, 2013·Twitter for iPhone
Twitter
Jeffw
@Jeffwni
Q: Why did the hipster burn his mouth?
A: Because he’s a fucking idiot.
1:45 PM · Sep 17, 2014·Twitter Web Client
Twitter
oibob
@oibob
“Hey Bob, why did the hipster burn his-”
“HE’S AN IDIOT. “
“ No, wait-”
“HE’S AN IDIOT HIPSTER FUCK. I HOPE HE DROPS HIS IPHONE. “
1:44 AM · Nov 18, 2014·Twitter for Mac
Reddit—Jokes
Posted by u/Larkson9999 December 30, 2020
Why did the hipster burn his mouth on his coffee?
Because he’s an idiot.
COMMENTS
Svadharma2
Because he drank it before it was cool....
ApprehensiveBank5230
oh yeah this is better
Above, a 1934 plaque from the Big Apple Night Club at West 135th Street and Seventh Avenue in Harlem. Discarded as trash in 2006. Now a Popeyes fast food restaurant on Google Maps.
Recent entries:
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“Online flirting is all fun and games until someone buys a plane ticket” (5/27)
•
“Only in America can you get arrested for feeding the homeless & be sentenced to community service” (5/27)
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“In Texas, the shortest distance between two points is likely under construction” (5/27)
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“New York is the only town where the shortest distance between two points is under construction” (5/27)
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Entry in progress—BP (5/26)
More new entries...
Above, Big Apple Corner at 54th Street and Broadway in Manhattan. Google Maps.
Above, John J. Fitz Gerald, from the Aug. 15, 1931, Binghamton (NY) Press, pg. 14.
Listen to Robert Emmerich introduce "The Big Apple," a hit song from 1937. Music written by Bob and performed by Tommy Dorsey's Clambake Seven with Bob on piano. Lyrics written by Buddy Bernier and sung by Edythe Wright. Audio provided by Dorothy Emmerich.
Also listen to a 1937 "The Big Apple" song by Ozzie Nelson and his Orchestra. See a 1929 photo of John J. Fitz Gerald and a 1931 photo of John J. Fitz Gerald.
This site is edited by Barry Popik.