Recent entries:
• “The ‘Texas Chainsaw Massacre’ film was a big lie. They didn’t damage a single chainsaw” (6/12)
• “Lubbock, Texas is so flat that if you stand on a penny you can see Dallas!” (3/23)
• “The four seasons of Texas: January, Summer, Summerer, Christmas” (3/23)
• “Welcome to Austin. Please don’t move here (I hear Dallas is great!)” (3/23)
• “This town ain’t big enough for the both of us” (1/6)
More new entries...

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“What do they say in Paris, TX?"/"Oui-haw!”
Tequila Daisy (cocktail)
“The Texas legislature should meet two days every 140 years”
“Fort Worth is where the West begins, and Dallas is where the East peters out”
“Where the East peters out” (Dallas slogan)
“I like dillos, but do not support giving them guns. I would never armadillo”
Eighth Wonder of the World (Houston Astrodome)
“Where do Norse Texans go when they die?"/"Y’allhalla.” (y’all + Valhalla)
“Who do Texan Muslims worship?"/"Y’allah.” (y’all + Allah)
“What is the definition of ‘derange’?"/"De place where de cowboys ride.”
“What do you say to a Texas man driving a German car?"/"Audi.”
“Lubbock is in the middle of everything” (joke)
“Why did the cowboy get a hot seat?"/"Because he rode the range.”
“Why is Texas called the Lone Star State?"/"It’s their Yelp rating.”
“Why do Mexicans never cross the border in groups of three?"/"Because a sign says ‘No Trespassing.‘“
“How do you tell if a person is a level-headed country boy?"/"Snuff runs out of both sides.”
“What do you get if you cross a leprechaun with a Texan?"/"Pot of chili at the end of the rainbow.”
“I believe a lot of conflict in the Wild West could have been avoided…” (joke)
“Tornado warning in central Texas! Everyone head to Cowboys Stadium. No chance of a touchdown there”
“The turtle took two chocolates to Texas to teach Thomas to tie his boots”
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