“I never run with scissors. Those last two words were unnecessary”

A plaque remaining from the Big Apple Night Club at West 135th Street and Seventh Avenue in Harlem.

Above, a 1934 plaque from the Big Apple Night Club at West 135th Street and Seventh Avenue in Harlem. Discarded as trash in 2006. Now a Popeyes fast food restaurant on Google Maps.

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Above, Big Apple Corner at 54th Street and Broadway in Manhattan. Google Maps. Stolen and missing, 2021-2024.

Above, John J. Fitz Gerald, from the Aug. 15, 1931, Binghamton (NY) Press, pg. 14.

Listen to Robert Emmerich introduce "The Big Apple," a hit song from 1937. Music written by Bob and performed by Tommy Dorsey's Clambake Seven with Bob on piano. Lyrics written by Buddy Bernier and sung by Edythe Wright. Audio provided by Dorothy Emmerich.

Also listen to a 1937 "The Big Apple" song by Ozzie Nelson and his Orchestra. See a 1929 photo of John J. Fitz Gerald and a 1931 photo of John J. Fitz Gerald.

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Entry from July 01, 2018

“I never run with scissors. Those last two words were unnecessary”

“I never run with scissors. Those last two words were unnecessary” is a jocular anti-running saying that has been printed on many images. Children are often told not to run while carrying scissors (advice to prevent an accident), but this shortened saying means “I never run.”

“I never run with scissors. Those last two words were unnecessary” was posted on Twitter by kevin BANNER on June 8, 2011. The joke went viral after it was posted on Twitter by Gordon om February 6, 2012.

Twitter
kevin BANNER
@BannerComedy
I never run with scissors. Those last two words were unnecessary.
2:45 PM - 8 Jun 2011

Twitter
Gordon
@MisterBombay
I never run with scissors.
Those last two words were unnecessary.
7:02 PM - 6 Feb 2012

Twitter
Marco Williams
@MarcWilliams75
“@MisterBombay: I never run with scissors.
Those last two words were unnecessary.” - this is me to a T. Love this!
7:25 PM - 6 Feb 2012 from Caerphilly, Wales

Yahoo! Answers (June 19, 2012)
What is the meaning behind the saying, “I never run with scissors….. Those last two words were unnecessary.”?
Best Answer: “I never run with scissors… those last two words were unnecesarry.” means “I never run” - by removing the last two words of the first part of the phrase.
It just means that they don’t run.
It’s not deep or will reveal the meaning of the universe or something. (:

Google Books
Average Joe to Speaking Pro
By Bill Haubrich
Cottontail Publishing
2012
Pg. 95:
I never run with scissors. Actually, those last two words were unnecessary.

Google Books
5,000 Sidesplitting Jokes and One-Liners
Compiled by Grant Tucker
New York, NY: Skyhorse Publishing
2013
Pg. ?:
I never run with scissors. Actually, those last two words were unnecessary.

Twitter
Bill Murray
@BiIIMurray
I never run with scissors…those last two words were unnecessary.
11:14 PM - 11 Nov 2013

19 November 2013, The Advertiser (Adelaide, Australia), “The Last Word” by Marty Smith, pg. 18:
From the online pinboard Pinterest: “I never run with scissors. Those last two words were unnecessary.”

Twitter
Jack
@F_Divorce
I never run with scissors. (Those last two words were unnecessary.)
1:05 PM - 27 Jun 2018

Posted by Barry Popik
New York City • Exercise/Running/Health Clubs • Sunday, July 01, 2018 • Permalink

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